Journey Beyond Survival

So. I want to run faster. I want to run longer. I don't care about my weight on the treadmill right now. I just want to really be able to say I'm running! I want to do 5 full push-ups. I want to do 10 girl push-ups without my arms shaking. I want to do 150 crunches this way that way and any way. I want to get those 'unreachable' lower abs rock solid. What do you want?

Weight: 215 BMI: 30.0 (obese) Weight loss to date: +0.2 lbs from last week I'm sick. I gained. I'm not really feeling like talking right now. I gotta go blow by dose.

I am under no delusions that this will be the last and final hurrah in my battle with weight. I’m not even mad at the self that got me this way. I can’t believe I made it through the past two years without losing it mentally again. I want to learn a way to cope, even through trauma like that, that will keep me healthy. So by following the PLAN I will get: -natural remedy for the slightly depressed results of lithium -regain strong self-confidence -talk out problems instead of eating emotions -feel better each day -end weight of 175 lbs. -BMI of 24 -wear size 12ish