Edits From the Sister Diaries

*my sisters {married in or otherwise stuck with me} and my mom are fabulous.  We keep in touch with an online private journal. I found myself updating with some things that I thought might be amusing. Who am I kidding, I want to make more people laugh with my corny jokes.*

I’m happy to report that the visit to the Rett Syndrome Natural History Study went much better this time.  I think it had something to do with the fact that I broke my iphone and had to take books to entertain Chickadee.  Wouldn’t you know she chose the Cinderella book with dress-up veil and gloves attached?

It’s hard to think that a girl happily absorbed in her book and enthusiastically interacting with anyone commenting about her book was “uninterested in her world” like they said last time.  Plus a few props like a veil and elbow gloves never hurt to make a pink wheelchair occupant even more adorable.  She finds strangers so much more relatable when they're addressing her as Princess after all.

Browny*-the guinea pig-has worked her magic on Sprout.  Whatever was making him feel unheard, unnoticed, or even bullied at school has faded into the background as his confidence jumps forward.  I am so completely relieved.

We even took Browny to North Carolina.  The only place she could fit was shotgun since Mr. Survival had already gone to NC two weeks before.  She jumped on top of her house and sat pointing into the wind like a dog, desperate to see what was coming next.  She makes us all laugh.  At breakfast, Browny runs laps around her house faster and faster for at least a mile, occasionally having an excited twitch that looks something like a mid-air split second seizure.  I challenge anyone breathing not to see that without laughing until they cough on their own spit.  Browny is hoping that the kids will finish early enough that they can cuddle her for a little bit. They often do.

Miss is reading [and worse, comprehending] at the fifth grade level.  Mr. Survival has taken her on two dates to get new books.  Both times, I have confiscated it and breezed through it only to find it is completely inappropriate.  Really?  YA fiction talks about bodkins?  And spells out what they are explicitly?  And how they are used!  I DON’T THINK SO!   Not for my eight year old anyway.

I tell you this because Miss-master of all planners-brought only her 22 page Faith in God for Girls  pamphlet for the NC trip.  By the time we reached the South Side of SmallTown, she was already driving me CRAZY.  So I pulled into Wal-Mart.  I searched high and low.  There was nothing I’d already read which would keep her interested for a twelve hour drive, that she hadn't already read.

Until I saw it.  Mom.  You can look away now.  Sir Fartsalot.  Yes.  I knew that whilst my drive would be riddled with potty humor, at least my daughter wouldn’t be taught how to hate her body image or how men lust after young women.  By giggling over farts and the city of Armpit.

Okay.  Mom, you can read again.  We’re doing good.  We’re loving life.  Slightly stressed, deliriously happy and running around to medical appointments as if they were paying us to go.  We miss you all.

*****

luminousweb
Hullooooo from luminousweb!!  :D  Apparently there’s a Google chat feature embedded in GoogleDocs.  Who knew?  D:  Sorry, JBS.  Also, directed at JBS, I looked up bodkin because of your post.  It doesn’t look so bad, it’s just a dagger or needle, right?  Why did you not like Miss learning that?

JBS
Because I actually meant codpiece. (mom don’t click on that one)  Sorry.  Hee heee hee.  It’s not [very] funny, but you trying to figure out what the heck is wrong with a bodkin is.

*real name, please respect her privacy
**photo credit