Therapeutic Journey

*photo by pmarkham

So, here I sit on the edge of the bathtub.  At 4:44 AM no less, just as I have been all week.  We've graduated to Chickadee using Netflix on my iPhone, and me grabbing my laptop to write a post.  It's the only time it's going to get done anyway.  She hates when I'm asking her in ever increasing moments, "Are you done?  Hit mommy's hand if you're done."  Half the time I swear she hits my hands or looks in my eyes as requested simply to get me to shut up.  Ten minutes later she needs a new diaper, but at least mommy's out of her face!


It could be worse, yesterday she did it at 2:30 AM.  I've been an insomniac this week and hadn't gotten to sleep  until the depths of 11:00 PM in spite of being in bed at 8:30 PM.  So, yesterday was rotten, because 4 o'clock seems to be an hour Chickadee loves dearly and woke early to see it too.  


All this is to say that I feel guilty for missing my workout yesterday.


But even more important, it's a long preamble for my real purpose in posting today.  I've started the long process to get Chickadee a therapy dog.  Chickadee could use a therapy dog to help with socialization, her hand movements, and alerting us to her needs.  A therapy dog could come get me when Chickadee needs to go potty, or let me know she just wants to party.  By slamming the door as it leaves her room? Or something.  He hehe.


Actually THIS BLOG of a Rett girl getting her therapy dog and training with it Right NOW[!] has been amazing to watch unfold.  Also this OTHER BLOG has been helping me be realistic as a mom with an autistic girl shares what's it's been like to have their therapy dog since August.  Chickadee would use the dog quite differently, since she is not mobile, and both these girls seem to use the dog specifically as 'runners' who dart away from safe adult supervision with out warning.  No, the Midwest Assistance Dog Inc. is working with Chickadee and I preparing some unique ways a dog could help her specifically.


Chickadee's speech therapist suggested it clear back in July/August, advising that the socialization alone would make it worth it, but also the incentives for therapy were limitless, and the potential was there for the dog to be a real service to her.  Such as aspiration alert, or even coming to me when Chickadee is distressed but unable to vocalize since it seems making audible sounds is difficult for her under stress.  Chickadee love love loves doggies, but the thought was overwhelming then in the midst of a pretty nasty regression.  I've mulled it over, and even though we're strapped for cash and are using relics of our past to accomplish our mission (electronics borrowed from a dying company on the cheap, internet for Mr.Survival's fledgling startup)  I feel like this is something tangible that I can DO.  You know?  


Probably not completely, but I think you catch my drift.  I can't control the regressions, that's something my subconscious is apparently having a hard time grasping.  It's taking a toll on my mind and body.  A therapy dog would help.  No matter what happened to her.  It would always be helpful.  I think I can do that for her.  Get her a dog.


So, yup.  We all, most especially me, thought I was done campaigning when $250,000 was won from Pepsi for research.  Unfortunately, I've locked onto this idea like a life preserver in the middle of a freezing sea.  I want it for her.  I even can admit I want it for me.  I want to see her entertained, participatory in life, without the need for my direct intervention. I want her enabled.  I want her to get what she needs from me without having to find her with silent tears running down her cheeks and a look of isolated despair.


This is why I feel so guilty about not exercising yesterday.  Because I've started training for a 10K.  It's sort of a race for me to see which one I can get to first.  Train for a 10K or raise enough money for a therapy dog.  I've had to start back on the Couch to 5K program.  I missed my second run yesterday, and now, here it is 5:42 AM and I've missed it today too.  Chickadee is happily trying to go back to sleep.  Still.  Very happily.


But, it will happen.  My run.  Her sleep.  Enough donations.  The way I figure it between my JBS friends and my "RL" friends, I have about four hundred people just on facebook and this blog.  If I can get even half of them to contribute $10 I've got $2,000 for Chickadee.  I'm gonna blitz the local media (like I know how to do that) and give this my best shot.  What do you say?  Will you either contribute or share today?  I know that seems to happen alot with me.  I appreciate it.  I'm amazed at how wonderful people have already been!  Between JBS fundraising and Real Life, we already have $175 raised, and all I've done is put up a little box!  You people are amazing.


If you don't have the money.  I totally understand.  If the tables were turned, I couldn't do it for me either.  But, would you forward it to people who maybe could?  Think about it, let me know, and if you do let me know too.  I would love to keep track of how far reaching your kindnesses are.  You are all amazing, and I'm counting on all of you.  Thanks for rescuing me this past year, and my daughter in advance.


xoxo
JBS


DONATE HERE (thanks Karen I'm a teensy tired!)


**there is not a specific dog picked for Chickadee at all yet, the picture is just cute.