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Everything is Gonna Be All Right

I am HERE. I had hoped to get farther, but I know this place like the back of my hand. Okay, not that specific site, but it gives you the flavor of the town. We stopped here once upon a time when my entire family decided to conspire against me and vomit. Hubbend. Chickadee. miss THANG. Beansprout. Somehow I survived. A stop with a McDonalds, grocery store, and nice hotels is memorable at that point.

Did you know that Handicapped Accessible rooms have parking spaces right in front of them? With exterior doors? Ahhh. Perfect for the war-torn woman traveling with three kids. I didn't realize that Hubbend was actually leaving me.

Not until he called me from inside the airplane to tell me he'd made it onboard. We'd stopped a THIRD time for miss THANG to go potty at an oasis. Chickadee was not happy. Beansprout thought peeing in a cup was novel, so he had done it again unnecessarily.

When Hubbend said, "I'll see you again in time for the reunion" it hit me like a ton of bricks. He isn't on a quick day trip. Or over-nighter. Even the three or four day European cram session has become normal. Even though I'll have my family, I don't have my decompressor.

This is why I had to go home. Chickadee is in a bad place, and I don't know where the landslide will stop. Nobody does. I can't be alone with all that swimming at the back of my mind all the time. Not when insomnia strikes.

Bipolar NOS seems to mean that my brain can get on an endless repeat cycle of thoughts. Like my ipod or a hamster on a wheel. I want to stop, but they just resurface. That is why I bought all my prescriptions, and I have my sleep aide.

And I can't wait to see my mommy. I'm so excited to go home! That helps more than anything.

I'm tweeting. I'm trying to remember to forward them to facebook too. Check out my view of the Mississippi River last night. It is nice to have a handi placard every once in a while. I promise I'll try to show you how fun it can be!

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Comments

  1. KCLAnderson (Karen)August 27, 2010 at 7:17 AM

    Thank you for sharing it all JB! Remember that we're all here, standing right behind you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousAugust 27, 2010 at 10:24 AM

    I'm so glad you're going home. I miss you, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  3. KellyAugust 27, 2010 at 2:17 PM

    Amazing how seeing mommy is the antidote to whatever ails us. even though I know she can't solve much in my adult life, there's something about that all-knowing unconditional love that puts my life in perspective.

    Have a wonderful time on this adventure!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yum YuckyAugust 27, 2010 at 2:31 PM

    Make sure you rest in your Mommy's arms for awhile. I'm so glad you get your Mommy right now. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Tami@NutmegNotebookAugust 27, 2010 at 2:49 PM

    There is no place like home no matter what age we are.

    Safe travels to you.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Leanne @ Deep Fried FruitAugust 28, 2010 at 1:57 AM

    Hope you get to relax a little, smile a bit and sleep a lot inside the comfort of Mommy-ville.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Katie J ♥August 30, 2010 at 6:39 PM

    I am with Tami. Even at my age I still want my momma sometimes.

    Hoping and praying that things work out the way you want them to JBS.

    ReplyDelete
  8. BarbaraAugust 30, 2010 at 10:17 PM

    Travelling with three kids WITH the husband is hard enough, I hope you survived. Enjoy your time with your family. I love extended family.

    ReplyDelete

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