I get asked about psychosis quite a bit. People are fascinated with the actual break from reality. Horrified and yet unable to look away.
What I find much more important, is how NOT to get there. I find that most books about mental health are either too sterile or they are condescending. At least, I do now. When I am desperate I buy a bunch of books and try to make their assessments fit myself. The books do help me gain quite a bit of insight, but sometimes an outside trained person, like a therapist, in front of me is what it takes.
So, this is what I do when everything is going wrong in my life. I think you'll find it's very similar to a lot of self-care recommendations:
- exercise
- balanced diet
- prayer
- positive affirmations
- scheduled routine
- prioritize
- relaxation exercises
- realistic limits
All of them work. All of them help. They do not make reality go away. They are not like drugs, sex, or alcohol. But they do work. My reality is that when I need to escape, it means I need to literally remove myself from a stressful situation and take a break. Novel, I know. Or, I need to confront people and lay down my boundaries. Difficult for me.
But I'm learning. Will you please share with me what you do for self care?
I love how you point out that it is NOT all that different from what we all do for selfcare.
ReplyDeletemine changes depending on where I am in my life.
these days its reading.
running away with my kindle so I can run away in my MIND from what is frazzling and stressing me.
In the last week, I have had sleepless nights (less than 4 hours) 5 times. I have not been to the gym since last wednesday, though I have been out in the heat for a 3 mile walk a few times and done yardwork consistently. I haven't been in the car to leave my house since last thursday. And last night was my first shower in days.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what comes first, the inability to sleep that leads to lack of workouts, or the other way around. But when the cycle starts, I spiral down to a point of being smelly and unable to leave the house.
Joe laughs. Things it's just one of my 'quirks'. Truly doesn't understand that getting to that point is not funny or eccentric. It's scary.
And that is what makes me force myself to do something to break the cycle, because I've never ridden the wave as far as it will go. Terrifies me. So last night I took a walk, made myself chat with a neighbor instead of pretending I didn't see them out, came home and showered/washed my hair, and took a sleeping pill.
And I'm going to go work out some of this crazy at the gym this morning. I will I will I will.
Exercise, weekly alone time, cooking, blogging...
ReplyDeleteThe interesting lesson here for me is that, as you point out, I should be doing pretty much the same things for myself.
ReplyDeleteHmmm. My 'self-care' isn't helpful I don't think, and it's something I am working on. Your list sounds a lot healthier and a hundred times more sensible :)
ReplyDeleteI indulge. I practice self-indulgence as an antidote to years and years (decades) of stressful and traumatic life. I do it only because I have (early) retired from the workplace. I waste my days doing things I enjoy (that's good) but which are mostly sedentary..and too much alone, self-indulgent time isn't actually beneficial I am finding. Just the opposite in fact in that jobs pile up and the old backside spreads even more! Then angst and self-flagellation take over..I know we all need to rest and reflect but too much of it isn't good!
Real self-care would be burning all the chairs in my house and the TV and the computer ;-) Then I'd be forced to be more productive. Yes, 'achievement' gives me satisfaction, so for me, self-care involves getting satisfaction from 'doing' and completing things..even if the 'doing' involves giving myself a long-overdue pedicure or cleaning the bathroom! Sometimes it has mental and physical benefits. (I am sure this reply isn't helpful!)
Prayer has been my lifeline lately and has given me a peace that I had been missing during the time when prayer was put on the back burner.
ReplyDeleteIts all about checks and balances, and working toward betterment. I will get there...might even catch you one day.
I've been trying to identify my coping mechanisms, and I'd have to go with playing Dr. Mario and chatting with friends so far. I know there are more. Self-care...ummmmm...well, we try to eat fairly healthy, but when I get stressed that kinda goes out the window (big surprise!) I do try to read my scriptures and pray, too. My day usually feels a lot more grounded if I get that in first.
ReplyDeleteAlso, your comment about positive affirmations made me smile and think of this vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qR3rK0kZFkg
HOW do you literally remove yourself from a stressful situation and take a break? That's what I need to do!
ReplyDeleteI really need to estabilish a basic solid self care regimen for myself..especially my mental ups and downs..to function.
My coping mechanisms are not healthy..I often want to run away. I used to sort of do just that..I would literally go away for a few days. I can't do that now.
This was a very good, thought provoking post..and timely for me. Thanks!
Blueprint for mental, physical and spiritual health. It IS interesting how the basic truths are the basic truths across the board.
ReplyDeleteI was intrigued to hear tht a lot of people ask you about psychosis. That is one of the scariest conditions I can think of, and yet you are restored to full mindedness, armed with more important knowledge about the care and feeding of yourself. I love your posts. Hows little Chickadee doing?
I'm a cryer. I have to cry when things get to that point where I'm completely overwhelmed. Since I know this about myself, and to make me look a little less pathetic, I usuallu turn on a cry-jerker type of movie or some such and sob my eyes out. When I'm done I'll go to bed and curl up inthe fetal position. The next morning I usually excercise a combination of avoidance and denial of whatever problems turned me into a sniffling mess the day before.
ReplyDeleteYou're approach sounds much healthier than mine. Don't listen to me, I just realized I'm terrible at taking care of myself!
Affirmations are hugely affective. I use them myself AND I use them with clients as a success training technique. They're actually "scientifically" proven to assist retrain the reticular activating system to retain certain information when on the road to achieving a goal. I love affirmations! You do good self care JBS ...
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to let you know I left you an award on my page! Yup, I picked you as a Versatile Blogger! Stop by and pick it up!
ReplyDeleteTake care,
Maggie
For me - I revert to me - the real me who wants to hide from the world and never come out. I take time for just me and the husband and he holds me - until all the hurt is gone. It may be selfish - but it works.
ReplyDeleteI think exercise has made a huge difference in my well-being. I am trying to be a better prayer and believe in its power whole heartedly. And my good old stand by is taking a long shower and having a good cry. It works every time!
ReplyDeleteSelf care can be a tough one because it is easy to put everyone else and their needs ahead of my own.
ReplyDeleteWhen I get reclusive and don't want to go out in public for several days I am heading down a slippery slope.
I make myself go somewhere to break the cycle.
Blogging,walking, listening to upbeat music, guided meditation, healthy eating with no added sugar are just a few things that keep me where I need to be.
Wow having been on the watching caring end I don't like it either way it comes out. There has been a bit of it happening around me this last few weeks. Stress What about sleep thats one that I rate as way important for selfcare.
ReplyDeleteI gave you a Versatile Blogger award you might have one but I don't care your wonderful to keep doing all that you do.
I try to do things that give me energy. If that's going back to bed, going for a run, swimming, getting a coffee. Space.
ReplyDelete