Train Wrecked

Do you even want to read this?

I suppose the real question is, why don't I want to write it? I'm voting for: I haven't processed my emotions about so many big things in so long that I'm afraid to start. How depressing.

Anyway. My sleep was disrupted twice by my husband arriving home at 11:30 as well as my special girl giggling and shrieking at 2:30. We retired to the guest bedroom where we stayed awake an hour and a half. Then we slept until 6:30. Or rather she did. Remembering rather suddenly that her diaper was old, I stopped trying to soothe her back to sleep in my sleep and jumped out of bed.

My oldest was half an hour late to get out of bed to go to school, so I padded out to get her up and got fluid intake for youngest. By the time the bus left and I had eaten a bowl of Kix, I realized I needed to leave in a half hour to get to the Orthodics on time. In good weather.

I became my mother in her worst hurricane moments. And it all ended with a crash around 2:30 PM. I got to the Dr. half an hour late. I spent too much at toys 'r us. I spun out too many times (my stupid bald tires were scheduled to be removed, just like the groceries were supposed to be gotten) I duct taped a diaper to my child. I packed scissors and more duct tape. And 85 pound GoodNights for my 30 pound child. I packed fluid. I packed thickener to add to fluids if I needed to buy more fluids. I ate Taco Bell Diet Thru combo with water. I don't care what the calories were. We literally ran through the real estate showing (we were both running late due to weather).

But, somebody brought me dinner. They made me cookies, and fresh bread and soup. And I could have cried because it was so beautiful.